I spent 6 years on the University of Arkansas campus. I have to say, as a Black queer person, I never felt safe. I felt safer than being out in the city, but I still did not feel safe walking to my dorm or anything.
Tonight as I was walking home from work, I decided that I wanted to get food on campus. Mind you, I am no longer a student. I graduated with my M. A. in communication a month ago. As I was walking onto campus from the nearby street of bars and restaurants, I felt a sigh of relief the more that I made it onto campus. It was like, I felt the warm embrace of a familiar friend. I felt safe. I stopped looking over my shoulder. I just enjoyed the walk to get food.
This may seem like nothing to many of you who may read this, but I spent the majority of my time on campus feeling like I have to look over my shoulder, not look people in the eye, and be careful when walking at night. However, now, it was like all of the anxiety was gone. I felt safe from the "real" world. Actually, it felt a lot like visiting your high school. I just felt above all of the thoughts and things that happened there. Nothing changed though. The campus is still majority white, greek-life affiliated, conservative, etc. But now...I don't know. I felt different. I will also say that I was so relieved to be off of work and I looked like crap. So no one what around and I blended in pretty much. Maybe that influenced how I felt. I really don't know.
If you are new, much of my blog is me exploring my own thoughts in a way that I may talk to a friend. It isn't polished and I am not pretending to know it all. It's just me...